I’ve known my wife for 20 years now… literally half of my life. There are a lot of things that make her happy, but there is one thing that it took me a few years to realize not only makes her happy, but also seems to make a lot of women happy. Listening to my wife’s friends talk about their husbands, this is the one thing that they brag about the most when their man does it:
Care about things.
That is, don’t just go through the motions. Don’t “phone it in.” No matter what “it” is, put your heart and sweat into. Focus on it. Act like it’s the most important thing in the world at that moment. Act like it’s critical that you do this thing and do it well.
One of my wife’s friends visited just a few days ago, and she couldn’t contain her smile as she talked about the amount of thought and effort her husband put into their family’s backyard firework for the 4th of July this year. She talked about how he budgeted for them, made a special platform for them, drove all the way to Indiana for them (they’re actually illegal here), invited the neighbors and their kids over to enjoy the show, etc… This woman was so happy that her man did all of this stuff, not because she’s a fan of fireworks, but because it showed that he cared about something. He wasn’t just going to do a half-assed firework display because his kids were nagging him about it. Once he committed to doing it, he put his best effort into it.
Few things are more unattractive to a woman than a man who doesn’t care about anything… a man who is always unhappy, hates his job, complains all of the time, etc… If they’re married to that man, that woman isn’t going to be very happy.
I’m saying this mostly as advice to younger guys. Most of us married guys have figured it out on our own. Want to make your woman happy? Starting right now, whatever you do, do it the best that you can. Put some effort into it. Be passionate about it.
Care. That’s what most women are looking for.
Care about what’s for dinner.
Care about how your wife’s day was.
Care about how the kids’ days were.
Care about how the house looks, inside and out.
Care about your job, and not just the paycheck it provides.
Care about your appearance.
Care about your health.
Care about your future.
Trust me… if you’re single, women will notice you as a man who gives a damn, and they’ll find it attractive. If you’re with a woman, your woman’s happiness will increase along with how much you care about things.
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