Man is faced with different challenges of life, sometimes, it may be from our family, relatives, friends, or other people who live around us. We have been running away from our problems for a long time now, the funny thing is that after running away, we come back to meet the same problem we ran away from. I believe it's time we start looking for the solutions to the problems we face in life instead of running away from them. Many people are faced with different social problems but the most disturbing one that sometimes causes depression is when people take them for granted.
Many people take us for granted, it could be our husbands, wives, parents, friends, people living around us, etc. This social problem has caused a lot of damages in our lives, it makes us lose our pride and dignity, it brings about self-criticism, low self-esteem, mental and physical depression, it reduces our social value, etc.
People take us for granted because we accept it as our fate. This makes us do nothing about it. My dear, nobody is born superior to the other, we are all equal in the eyes of God. The best solution to solve a problem is facing the problem. So instead of allowing people to take us for granted, we should look at the reasons why these people always take us for granted. For instance, many husbands have complained about how their wives have been taking them for granted. I usually tell the people who come to me that the problem is not the wife nor the husband. The problem is how they relate to each other. If you have a wife who doesn't great you anymore when she sees you, even when you come back from work. It means that there is a problem. What to do is to sit her down and talk to her, saying these words, "Darling, I have noticed a change in your attitude towards me. You don't greet me anymore or give me a warm welcome any time I come back from work, is there any problem?" Talking to her this way will make her speak out. But if you keep her quiet she will keep doing that and when she gets used to it. It becomes a character.
There six major reasons why people always take you for granted, these reasons make them see us as people with no value. Read on as I bring you these 6 reasons.
#1. Putting Other People First
This is a very big mistake done by us almost every day. When Jesus was on earth, he put himself first over other people that was why he conquered all evil, he knows his purpose in life and didn't allow anything to take that from him. We don't consider ourselves before doing taking any decision. We are responsible for everything that happens to us both good and bad. Before you accept any offer from anybody make sure you think about yourself first. How will you do this? You have to think of how the offer will affect you negatively, what impact will it have on you. Do you need to accept that offer? I advise you shouldn't accept people's offer if you know it will go against your will and cause you negative effect. Doing this will help people know your worth. They won't request things you can't do from you. This will reduce the risk of being taken for granted and people will respect your opinion.
People who you put first in your life will not consider you when asking you to do the things that are over your capability because they know you can't resist them. So be careful when accepting people's requests.
#2. You Can't Say "NO"
People-pleasing kills when you overdo. 99 percent of people who are being taken for granted find it hard to say "No." Even when they know that accepting everybody's request makes them experience pain on the inside. My dear, you should be very careful because saying 'yes' to everybody makes them regard as a nobody. When Jesus Christ was on earth, He didn't please everybody. You should learn to say "yes" when needed and say "NO" when you have to say "No." Saying yes all the time makes you lose your dignity and people will always take you for granted.
#3. You are predictable.
Some people are so predictable, you can easily tell where they are, what they are doing at every given time, what they can do, and what they can't do. Being predictable is very dangerous, it makes people look down on you because they know your every move. They will easily take you for granted because they know you can't do what they can. If you want people to respect don't allow them to know your every move. Make yourself a difficult person to understand.
Yes, once you're predictable everybody will lose interest in you because they can't talk to you about serious matters. This means that your personality worth nothing in their face.
#4. You are scared which makes it hard for you to confront people
Who are you afraid of and what are you afraid of? Nobody is greater than you, don't mind the person's wealth or physical appearance. Don't limit yourself to dirty decisions. Just because that boy is rich doesn't mean he has the right to call you names. "Oh! If I confront him, he will lock me up." Sometimes we build negative thoughts within us, these thoughts play around for our fears limiting us to make decisions that will affect us negatively. If anyone wrongs you, don't be afraid to confront him and tell that person you don't tolerate what he or she did. Let them understand that your personality doesn't allow such behavior. This will make them respect you and ask for your forgiveness, this will also change a person's attitude towards you. This makes you gain your societal rights and nobody will intimidate you.
#5. You don't believe in yourself
When you don't believe in yourself who will? Some people like depending on other people to do things for them. My dear, dependency kills. It makes people look down on you. If you don't want people to look down on you need to believe in yourself and do things you are capable of doing by yourself. Don't have that feeling that without someone you won't achieve your dreams. Doing things by yourself will make people believe in you. This will make you prove your worth and people will recognize you. When people recognize your ability they won't joke with your opinion and you will have an edge in everything you do.
#6. You give more than you get back
Life should be 50-50, we will progress when we give and receive because life is giving and taking. Don't be the only person that gives out. If you always give out important things without receiving, one day you will have nothing to give. This is why most people who are in relationships are being taken for granted by their partners. When you give up everything for a relationship that is not working. You will end up giving your life up for the relationship. Be warned. Don't allow people to oppress you, not even your partner because, in the end, you will be the one to receive all the blames.
Do these things to stop people from taking you for granted. These are smart ways to stop being taken for granted:
#1. Say "NO" when you need to say "NO."
#2. Don’t Be Nice All the Time.
#3. Face The People That Take You Without Any Consideration!
#4. Don’t Show Up: Let Your Absence Represent Itself.
#5. Stop Constantly Putting Yourself In Other’s Shoes.
#6. Make Good Decisions That You Simply Will Stand By!
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