Break-ups are fairly hard. But, if two people are ready and willing for a resolution after a breakup, there are ways you can work things around.
Here are 5 questions you need to ask yourself before becoming friends with your ex.
(1) Are They In The Same Place As You?
Yes, I know this is an obvious point to ponder over. But, we seldom think what the other person wants in order to satiate what we want. So, the first step is to ensure your ex wants to be friends too. Because if she doesn't, then you really can't force her can you? You can just wish them luck and hope they're happy.
(2) Can You Trust Them Again?
If you guys ended on bad terms, then you have to think about how you want to go about this. If she did something to break your trust, can you factor trust in your equation, again? Of course, it wouldn't be in the same capacity as before, because you're not trying to get back together. You're trying to be in a good space as friends. So, if you trust your ex enough to not engage in any form of negativity or turn around to start a fight, then you should go ahead with it.
(3) Do Either Of You Have Feelings For Each Other?
This one's a tricky situation only because you may think you're over her. But, if you're not really over her that can be a bit blurry while making a decision to keep in touch with her. Maybe you should sit down and think about your feelings for her. If you think they haven't changed since you started seeing her, then it is a bad idea to remain friends with her.
(4) Do You Hold A Grudge?
You can hold a grudge against your ex for a number of things, that is why she's your ex, to begin with! But, if the grudge is minor and not too vicious then perhaps you can work on letting it go. But, if it's a major grudge and cannot be reversed, then there isn't any point in looking out for any association, because you'll never be able to let the resentment really go.
(5) Have You Had Enough Time Apart?
It's practically impossible to extend an arm of friendship when you've just broken up. Ideally, it takes more than half the time you've spent with your ex, to be friends with them, after you two have broken up. If you've never been friends before then it's a bit tough and only time apart can make that possible.
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