Sign in
Download Opera News App

Relationships Parenting Wedding

 

Love relationship

 

Dating Romantic

How to know if it is Love or Lust at first sight

Love is a powerful word and one thing about love is that it last for a very long time if not forever and love withstans all atrocities. However lust is just a temporary phase. Love and lust are often mistaken for each other , but they end up playing in different directions in time. Learning whether you are in love or lust is important, as you can better judge the amount of energy, effort, and investment you may want to put into the relationship long-term.

How your brain react: The brain react differently to lust and love, different part of the brain pick up lust and love stimulus. While the part of the brain that picks up lust is also the part that pick up stimulus of pleasure and food. While the part that picks up love is also the part that picks up joy of getting a reward.

How much you share with each other: If you prefer to keep things casual, and not delve into deeper emotions, this may be lust territory. "If you have a great sex life but lack emotional connection and can't open up," it may be lust and not love, Kimberly Hershenson, LMSW tells Bustle. "If you're always up for sex but there is little interest in having conversations this is a sign of lust not love. When you love someone you should feel supported and be able to express your needs."

How you fantasize about them: if you only fantasize about them, you're likely feeling more lust. "[If] you don't discuss real feelings but would rather keep the relationship on a fantasy level," that is more like lust, Hershenson says. While fantasizing about your partner isn't unique to lust only, if you find that you prefer the fantasy life over being honest and open about certain not-so-perfect realities of your relationship, this may not be love. "When you love someone there should be trust, honesty and communication," Hershenson says.

How much you are willing to sacrifice for them: When you're in love, stakes may seem higher, and you're willing to sacrifice more for your partner. According to studies led by Dr. Helen Fisher, an anthropologist at Rutgers University, when you're in love, you're willing to sacrifice nearly anything for the other person, so much so that it could even put you in harm's way or at a major inconvenience, as you're making your partner a priority.

Do you think in term of "you" or "we": If you're in lust, you might be more focused on what your goals and needs are. However, when in love, you might start to say "we" in conversation and think of things you both will do together, outside the bedroom and with others. "Love is about giving and investing in another person," Shlomo Zalman Bregman, matchmaker and rabbi in NYC tells Bustle. "These are the emotions that accompanying loving someone else ... not swallowing up and devouring and taking. So, you'll start to think about what you both can do for each other as a unit, as opposed to looking out for yourself." When you start to plan the future around the two of you, it shows you are seriously committed to this person.

How you are willing to try new things with them or for them: When in love, you might be more inclined to try new things, such as learning a new skill to impress them or learning it with them to strengthen your bond time. it's a way of showing a commitment and investment in the relationship, counsellors say, when the brain is open to new adventures and gets stimulated by the idea of spontaneity with a partner, it could mean you're ready for the commitment which translate to love.

Content created and supplied by: Femiisamson (via Opera News )

Love or Lust

COMMENTS

Load app to read more comments