Sometimes knowingly or unknowingly, we end up hurting our girlfriends deeply, which makes them want to break up. Unfortunately, only after this jolt do we realize their importance. Firstly guys, don’t ignore when she says she wants to break up. Don’t blame PMS. Chances are that she is actually hurt, and wants to sever all ties with you.
Follow this guide to take your relationship from the darkness back into its glory.
1. Listen To Them
The best place to start the process is to listen. If your partner talks about being unhappy and blames you for the most part, instead of protecting your man ego and going defensive, just lend a patient ear to the concerns of your partner. The best thing to do is to get more information. Ask questions. How long has this been going on? When did she first realize she’s been unhappy? Can she think of what else might be going on that is making her feel this way?
2. Acknowledge Their Pain
After listening, reflect back on what you’ve heard. Acknowledge the distressing thoughts and feelings that your partner has been suffering and recognize how tough that must have been for her. Acknowledging suffering shows respect and is not an acceptance of blame. Take time away to consider the feedback. Understand that if you’re the problem, you can be a part of the solution.
3. Try To Change
Moment by moment. Thought by thought. Breath by breath. Step into the most powerful question: What can I do? I don’t want her to suffer anymore. Tell her you will make her love you again. Don’t take your partner’s statements personally. Just like you don’t have to take “You’re fired” personally. Or “You’re a jerk” or “You didn’t win the prize.” These are just words. You might not have been good at your relationship, but, it’s important to know that it is a practice you can work on, and make it work.
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